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This Year’s Christmas Card…

This Year’s Christmas Card…

So, I’m usually pretty clever when it comes to creating a Christmas card every year. With two boys who are willing to do just about anything for candy and a husband who can shop the shit outta some photos, it’s pretty fun to do. We’ve done Elves on Shelves and everything else. We’ve done Star Wars and we’ve done Die Hard. Die Hard was last year and by far, my favorite so I had no idea how I was going to outdo myself this year. Did I peak too early?!

I feel like I’m dragging ass this year. I should have been working on this since August but with the Halloween party, I focused on that instead. Now, with Thanksgiving being NEXT WEEK (GAH!) and the badass, fall weather we’ve been having, I’m stressed the fudge out over this card. So, I gave up. We are going to a park and we are taking plain old, pictures of my adorable blessings from Beavis. They’ll be great because we don’t do ugly but what they won’t be is clever. Sorry to let everyone down. BUT…I have decided to do something different this year…I think. You know how some people send letters with what the individuals in their family are up to? I think I’m gonna do that this year. I mean…we do stuff. Fun stuff. Great stuff, even! Who doesn’t want to be let in on our great accomplishments of 2018? Don’t answer that.  It’s a first for me, so I figured I’ll write a rough draft here and you can tell me what you think.

Merry Christmas and Happy 2019!

As we get ready to change out our calendars, I think back on what a great year 2018 was for the Tarabays. So many highs and surprisingly, very few lows. I yell so much around here, it’s hard to tell but I’m realizing that’s just my new normal and not really a low. We’ve been remarkably lucky in 2018 and I am so grateful for it.

Soooo, what have the Tarabays been up to? What have we accomplished? Did we do anything fun? Go on any good trips? Did we make special memories that will last us a lifetime? Yes, to all of the above. And thanks to Facebook and my love of photos, it’s been documented like a mofo.

We’ve had fun day trips. Monster Jam, Fiesta Texas, Train Ride with Thomas, Round Top, and Brick Fest to name a few. We’ve also done countless wineries and breweries because…wine and beer. And around here they all have playgrounds, so the kids entertain themselves while we relax. As long as we glance over at them every half hour to make sure they’re still upright and as long as the Goldfish hold out, the family is happy. If there’s a food trailer on site, we are set for the whole damn day. Everyone will smell bad but dammit, we had a good day.

We cruised to Honduras, Belize, and Mexico in May. The beaches in Roatan were beautiful but the people selling massages and hair braids were relentless and almost ruined it for me. Thank GAWD we had an open bar! My bullshit meter was set to cruise and nothing could touch me once I was four beers and two rum punches deep. Belize was great! The boys both climbed the Mayan ruins without complaint. I was scared shitless that they’d fall and die but they did great. Jameson had a serious case of swamp ass, so every photo we took, he looks like he’s digging at a wedgie. Mexico was Mexico so we stayed on the ship. The boys and I spent all of July in Kentucky and Tennessee catching up with family. And we spent a week in Gulf Shores, Alabama. Fred was able to meet us there so we could squeeze in a little time together. This trip will also forever be known as Windshield-mageddon. A rock hit the Jeep windshield while driving through Alabama. Fred suggested we wait to fix it until I get back to Texas just in case it was to get hit again. And would you believe the damn thing got hit TWICE?!?! That’s THREE TIMES I was hit by boulders! Yes, I said boulders. They were big! My windshield was shit when we got home. So bad we had to get it fixed ASAP because nobody could see out anymore. 2018…new windshield.

Fred and I celebrated seven years of wedded bliss. That was fun. We were 900 miles away from each other but hey, we celebrated. Well…I celebrated…with margaritas and queso. Not sure what he did because…well…margaritas. Can’t say that I even remember talking to him that day. I’ll do better in 2019, I promise.

I set the bar pretty low so that I’m not disappointed in myself at the end of every year. I’m pretty damn proud of my 2018 accomplishments. I got to Q11 on HQ!  And that’s not all! I made it to Day 17 of 80 Day Obsession, y’all! I legit hurt my elbow though and to this day, I can’t lift my Yeti with my right arm. I binge watched 482 hours of Netflix because Fred got rid of cable and I don’t know how to operate the damn tv. I got called in for jury duty and got sent home from jury duty but I got paid $6.00 for my troubles! Woooo hoooo! I ordered the large sweet tea when I got that check. We sold the silver Jeep and we lost Stifler this year, so it wasn’t all sunshine and happiness. I’ll miss that damn dog for life. The news about Costco’s 100 calorie boozy popsicles would have made things better but guess what…none for you, Texas. Maybe next year.

Fred is keeping the lights on for us. He’s a lighting overachiever, really. Like when he leaves the outdoor Christmas lights up until May. I was behind this 100% because you could barely see them and I hate begging him to put them up every year. But the letter we received from the HOA says that they were not supporting him like I was and they had to come down. Fred also discovered Tillamook Ice Cream and bought all of it. ALLLLLL OF IT. Don’t even try to look for it.

The boys are growing up. You can tell by their smell if nothing else. They took music classes this year and participated in tee-ball, hockey, parkour, and soccer. And with all of the time we spent at the pool this summer, they’re not too shabby at swimming now. I wouldn’t walk away for two minutes or anything but I’ve got a lot more faith in their dog-paddling abilities this year. And hold the phone, people…they learned what a landline was and how to use it! The phone rang one day and neither one of them flinched. I told them people actually used to care when that happened and that they would do something about it. We had a quick lesson and I don’t wanna brag or anything, but I’m pretty sure they could dial 911 if I fell off a ladder or something. And it’s been another year of no cavities!

Jameson graduated from Lupine Lane and has started kindergarten. I had a really hard time with this because I was so worried he’d be lost. I watched him walk down the hall and would email his teacher to find out if he’d actually gotten to class, which he did and I’m sure his teacher thinks I’m a damn nut. But he’s a wanderer.  I still walk him in and I’ll do it until he makes me stop. He loves it and he’s doing great! I’ve been to lunch with him a few times and his little friends adore him. My heart wants to explode when he talks about his buddies at school. He’s so smart and the stuff he’s coming home with now blows my mind. His little brain is filling up and it’s so cool to watch. He is learning to read. He can say a word out loud and come up with how to spell it right away. His writing is awesome and his imagination floors me. He went through a Titanic phase this year. So much so that we bribed him with it and it worked. If he was great at school for five days in a row, they would get to build the ship out of Legos. He was and Fred spent five hours putting it together on a Saturday. I napped. I’m liking Legos more and more. Especially the big sets. Currently, he’s obsessed with Minecraft and Mario. He could watch other people play it on television, all day. But he’s also started playing video games this year. He’s a badass on roller skates and I think he’ll do great in hockey because of it. Soft pants. He’s trying to get me to buy him soft pants. Someone explain to me why boys want to wear athletic shorts and pants all the time. I told him that they are for athletes. people who play sports. If he wants to start wearing them, he needs to be doing sports and be happy while doing them. He’s stopped asking for now. As long as my heart is still beating, my boys are NOT wearing soft pants in an outfit unless they are heading off to sweat somewhere. Still no loose teeth.

Jack. Jack has developed the best personality this year. We knew it was coming. He’s happy, smart, and stubborn as a mofo. He’s in his senior year at Lupine Lane now and he’s preparing for kindergarten like nobody’s business. No doubt he’ll be ready. He’s reading a bit and writing a lot. He loves to draw. His teacher loves his personality and says he’s very popular with all the kids in his class and is already saying he’s got a girlfriend. Her name is Zoe, by the way. Her Jack is very polite and never throws fits. My Jack is still learning. He loves to dance and he loves to sing. He sang Let It Go every night on our cruise. ALL BY HIMSELF. Elsa would be as proud as I was. Jack tries hard and is pretty good at any sport he tries. He’s competitive and maturing a lot too. He stays upright and on the field when someone takes the ball from him! Huge improvement from 2017 when he’d throw himself down or run to me crying. He checked somebody the other day that pushed him first and Momma was proud. Don’t take that shit, baby!  He’s really into Harry Potter now which makes Mom giddy as hell. He walks around every day with his wand, broom, and glasses and if you haven’t seen it, you should. Ask me for a pic. I’ve got tons. It’s adorable.  He’s slowly getting into video games because big brother likes them and he wants to do what he does. But he loses interest after a few minutes. He’s definitely an active boy. This kid also has style and is not afraid to wear shiny things. He owns that shit as long as it looks good. He truly is my little helper. He wants to help and will never say no when I ask him to do something. The kid always takes Mom’s side in anything. Mom is the best and he will cut you if you say otherwise. He’ll always be my little baby. He sleeps with bed rails and still doesn’t wipe his own ass but I’ve got high hopes for 2019. Oh! And no cavities!

It’s been a good year.

Cheers to a happy and peaceful 2019. Here’s hoping Target gets rid of those acid-washed jeans next year!


Happy Holidays from The Tarabays

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