You don't want none of this.

My First Post. Isn’t it cute?!

My First Post. Isn’t it cute?!

I’m sitting here. Alone. Fred’s at work. Boys are at $chool. I’ve had a busy day already.  Shut up. It’s busy to me. I took the boys to $chool, came home and watched three episodes of American Horror Story. That’s not the busy part. Officially scared shitless, I took the fastest shower known to woman. Never again. I’m seriously losing my love for all things scary, in my old age. I’m 43, by the way. Don’t feel a day older than 30, I swear. Okay, so I showered, put a face on, brought in some packages, discovered my Christmas present that Fred had hidden in OUR CLOSET, and then my phone starts blowing up with messages. Some were just for fun, some were for Rodan+Fields. So, I’m sitting down on my bed, two chats going from people wanting to order some RF (Funny. It’s a mother and daughter. Neither knows the other has reached out. The mother was going to buy it for her daughter as a gift. And I can’t say anything!) Anyhoo, phone is still blowing up with text messages, Cyber Week emails, and random other emails. One, in particular, catches my eye. It’s from the boys’ $chool, asking for donations for the angel tree. I don’t even open it. I can’t even afford to open the damn thing, much less donate to a family in need. You guys, I get that I’ve got it reeeaaaal good around here, believe me, but I don’t have it THAT good. I can go without the guilt today. (Until I pick the boys up and the tree is standing there with its judgy little angels all over it, staring me down, saying we only want Pop the Pig for Angelica, lady. Surely you can afford that.) Sorry, but I can’t. I am on what we in this house call a “budget”. Gross. This is a nasty little word that brings me down on a daily basis. I hate it but it’s my reality. Fred works and every damn dime is spoken for. Quite a large chunk of it on $chool but you get what you pay for and this place is amazing and I wouldn’t move them. Not even to help with my ugly budget. Here’s the thing though, the reason for my very, first blog post ever, I spend over half of my monthly budget on stuff for my kids and I don’t mind the stuff that I CHOOSE to buy them. I do love buying them cute shit! But when December rolls around, the time that we are at our “oh shit, we maxed out another credit card on the Hot Wheels Ultimate Garage, never mind that we bought the Hot Wheels Ultimate Garage, last year and then they went and made it more ULTIMATE, so now we have to get the new one with the gorilla climbing on it”, time of the year, I am broke! December is glorious! I love it. But I’ve got two kids with December birthdays and three kids and a husband to shop for, and that’s just the people under my roof. When the $chool tells me that I’ve got teachers with December birthdays and then the room mom, God love her, reaches out and tells everyone to throw some money in her venmo account and she’ll take care of their Christmas gifts, my wallet says “slow your roll, Leslee.” There are two teachers in each class for both of my boys and I wouldn’t trade them for anything in the world. Teachers are amazing and they don’t get near enough credit for what they do. I’ve been there and I know it. But FOUR teachers to buy gifts for, two have birthdays, and then the judgy angel tree is all too much. I don’t dislike any of these things. I’m all for gifting. I love to shop! And I’ll gladly buy anyone some presents…when I can. BUT…budget. So, what I want for Christmas is this…I’m gonna need for December to be 60 days long from here on out. If I’m going to stress myself out about gifts and shopping, I’m not going to be having any fun. Especially if I can’t afford to do it and it depresses me to the point of two bottles of wine a night instead of one. If I have 60 days and two paychecks to work with, I GOT THIS! Bonus: I’d have a legit excuse to keep my tree up for two months! Now, who do I write to get this done? I’ll google that when I get back from picking up the boys, taking them to parkour class, taking them to see Santa, and then taking them to a tree lighting at The Granduca. All while I hook these lovely ladies up with some RF love. See? I told you I was busy.

I am not sorry for any grammatical or punctuation errors. I really don’t give a shit. I was in a hurry and needed to vent. That’s what a blog is for, yes? This goes for any future posts, as well.

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